Thursday, January 15, 2026

bereavement 4

Prayers today for the departed soul 

We sit in the hall
Her photo garlanded,
she is smiling, natural
Fruits and flowers are laid out for her
Incense fills the air
The centre of attention, 
she must be happy where she is

No easy words 
for this grandmother 
who is all and more 
of the memories of those 
who mourn her, miss her, 
feel secret relief

She loved to pray, 
thought of God at all times

before and after spewing ungodly words 
that tore through 
skin muscle ligament veins 
to the very soul of those she lived with 

She always had a smiling face 
to welcome people  

but sat grim at home to greet family, 
ready to crush them beneath her feet

She'd wish good things for loved ones overseas, 
write in her book all their names everyday, 
so devout, so holy

then fill the air with sulphrous words, 
curse the ones she lived with 
for lacking consideration for her grace, 

She'd never fail to have a cup of tea ready for one grandchild

then berate the other 
for not offering her any food,
telltale, and watch blows rain upon him

The ones in her shadow
bore the brunt of the weight 
of the cloak of decency 
she shed upon entering home,
the dreaded battlefield 
where she shredded the family 
as commander in chief, 
a heavy presence
waiting to be waited on
only ever unhappy and 
and ever ready to show it. 

Ever strategic 
she showed this side to sum total three
who'd never be believed, 
who would have to bear the taunt
that they must have behaved heinously
to provoke a saint,
the self she showed the world.

So how do we mourn this being,
angel to the world
witch to the few,
compounded by the good death
she was granted:
speedy,
almost painless,
surrounded by loved ones, 
(who actually loved her 
for she was divine to these folk
she was visiting), 
granted a beautiful service,
air filled with prayer,
hallowed words that ring hollow
to the three who had quivered under her wrath,
wondering 
what went wrong with them?  

Maybe, all her prayers did help her,
even if her words and actions slashed

Maybe, God looking out for the three,
taking her away when she was away,
so they could do their duty 
more guest than host,
lifting a burden off their bent backs
freeing them after 15 years

Maybe they were her safe space 
to be her true self,
and better them than the world

There is hope
she is happy where she is now, 
the three need feel no guilt, 
just acceptance 
that angels are devils too with some,
and know they have permission to feel 
this uneasy mix at her passing, 
that it is okay to celebrate
her ominous presence lifted 
from their home forever

Unburdened,
maybe 
they can breathe, 
find themselves again

There is hope

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